It just gets harder and harder with each passing day. You are alone, you feel guilt sweeping through your bones; the guilt of ignoring your responsibilities and shutting out the people who claim to love you and when you’re in people, you are crushed down under your insecurities. You feel restless, your hands, your feet, every other part of you. You try to focus on reality but it just fades away, leaving you to cry out loud, ‘oh Lord, why me?’
Then you seek a moment of peace, to regain your strength and enjoy some silence, and they just laugh at you, making fun, enjoying your discomfort, filling you with pure rage but you can do nothing but contain it, inside you, and let it slowly destroy you. Stop, your mind screams and in that moment you really do want to stop – you want to stop breathing for once and for all.